Sunday, 27 January 2013

How NOT To Email Me

I know I'm not the only lady to get emails from the odd cretin but sometimes I actually really do despair with some of the mail I have the misfortune of receiving. This was just too 'good' not to put out there. Please take note and try not to write to me like this, EVER!

This is the reply I found in my inbox this morning, I wont bore you too much but the gist is he used that classic line "I'm not made of money .....", I'm sure you'll be able to work out what I said from his reply.

Hiya Beth, yeah I completely understand.  I know you earn a living and probably do a great job.  Your comparison to a plumber isn't accurate though cause if i called a plumber out i wouldn't want to see him again and again and I wouldn't be paying him cause i wanted to see him.  I understand you mean he provides a service but if i have a leak id fix it myself :-)  I just cant tie myself up andbum myself with  a stapr on, lol!
All I want is to see if its ofr me then im all yours, i know you get requests like this all the time but before i depart with my hard earned cash can you sort me out a session that doesnt cost me but will leave me wantin to pay you x

Ok do I have to point out what exactly is wrong with this? Aside from the spelling mistakes and the fact that he opens with "Hiya Beth", don't you just love the way that all I have to do for him to be all mine is give him a free session!

WOW!! Am I the luckiest lady in the world or what??

I haven't replied to this latest email as I'm sure he will eventually realise I'm subliminally telling him to Fuck Off, either that or he'll happen across this at some point.

Puppetboy NOT In The Snow

Still in my devilish sadistic mood I decided to set another task but this time seeing as there was no snow available but plenty of sea ........

Yeah you can guess where this is going; the report below is direct from the boy himself:

Miss Beth,

i can c-confirm i have c-completed Your latest t-task. Please find pictures attached.

There were definitely small flakes of snow in the air as i parked at a deserted Cornaa beach. i took the first pic of the choppy sea from the car, before removing my jeans, shoes and socks. i was sure there was a pair of Crocs somewhere in the house, but failing to locate them i had to make do with flip-flops to combat the pebbly beach.

Attaching the pegs to my nipples and taking a deep breath, i plunged into the bitter wind. A pair of polar bears ceased frolicking on the rocks to gaze curiously in my direction. It was a good hundred yards to the shoreline, and the stiff wind whipped my bare legs mercilessly. i paused at the water's edge and steeled myself (2nd pic). All the way down to the sea, the pegs had pinched my nipples painfully, but they seemed less important as i asked myself how bad it could be. i thought the better of dipping a toe in, and strode manfully into the waves.

The Arctic temperature hit me immediately and my progress slowed, but i pressed onwards. The swell of the waves made it difficult to capture a picture of myself knee-deep in the briny, but i hope pic 3 suffices. As the cold permeated my very bones, i turned to walk back to the beach. Accompanied by peals of ursine laughter from the rocks, a sneaky wave saw me off from Manannan's Kingdom with a freezing splash up my arse.

i trudged back to the car and grabbed my towel. i had dried my feet and legs and re-donned my jeans and socks before i even remembered about the pegs on my nipples. So, in answer to Your question, the cold was much worse than the nipple torture. i had the car heater on low as You recommended, and drove home for a hot cup of cinnamon tea. i have been home a little over an hour, and can happily report i am pretty much back to normal. Those polar bears will have some tales to tell down the pub on Friday night.

Thank-You for my latest task. i hope i have acquitted myself to Your satisfaction.

Humble regards,


PS i forgot to thank You for Your mercy in not sending me in 'balls deep'. If that had been the case, photos would not have been necessary, as i could just have fished them out and sent them to You!

I was crying with laughter reading his report and had to applaud him on his effort with the task in general. I rewarded him with another mini task which he again completed without hesitation.

Again I feel blessed to have a such a good boy in my stable, having fun with BDSM is an important thing and I think you can tell that he enjoys his tasks very much.

Well done puppetboy :)

LJ In The Snow

This boy never fails to make me smile and full on belly laugh. He is a wonderful toy to play with, so amenable and always happy to hurt/humiliate himself at my request so I thought I'd share with you my last task with him.

As we are all so painfully aware we have had quite a bit of snow fall so I thought that I would utilise this fact and have a bit of fun. As you may recall I did have him outside, naked in the freezing cold so this wouldn't be something totally out of left field. Needless to say when I mentioned the task to him he was still very apprehensive about it, however not so apprehensive that he didn't get an instant hard on over it lol.

So after a hard days work he texts me to tell me that they had fresh snow fall where he was and that he was looking forward to making me smile later that night. Now I never stipulated what time of day I required the task to be completed so upon his assumption it would be in the dark I immediately informed him that it would be in the day light. I don't think he was too pleased about this but being the good boy he is, he agreed anyway. Luckily for him as he arrived home he noticed his neighbours going out.

He was told to call me using FaceTime once he was inside the house, settled and naked, minutes later my phone rang and I was soon met with his cute smiling face. We chatted a little then not wanting to deviate from my amusement I told him to venture outside and set his phone up so that I could see him clearly. Once this was done I told him to lie down in the snow on his back and make me a beautiful big snow angel. As soon as his naked bottom touched the snow he let out a muffled cry which instantly started me cackling.

First snow angel completed to perfection he leaped up shivering and with a slight tinge of blue he ran inside the house. Now I never said he could go back in doors so I informed him that I wanted him back outside again to make a second snow angel but this time on his front. I could barely get the words out for laughing at the mere idea of him completing this part of his task. His smiley face dropped ever so slightly but having seen that his cock was hard I knew he was ok to carry on.

He walked briskly to the area of snow he used before and knowing it was going to be ridiculously cold, just flung himself down and gritted his teeth to do as was required of him. I was laughing so hard tears were rolling down my face and I may even have done a little wee! Task complete he leaped up once again shivering and moaning in discomfort (which I have to say turned me on immensely) I told him to step inside to recover.

We chatted a while so that I knew he was ok and then I discovered that although being laid face down in the freezing snow his cock was still hard! I immediately ordered LJ back outside to cool himself down by picking up a handful or snow and holding it on his cock and balls. The moans he let out as the ice touched his skin were exquisite and after a few minutes of this my sadistic needs were well sated so told him to get back in doors.

Now although his cock was blue and significantly smaller than before, he had no problem at all edging for me on cam straight away. His moans of discomfort soon changed to moans of pleasure and frustration and again I was smiling as he stopped stroking his cock before it was too late.

This was a fabulous cam session with a fantastic boy, I consider myself to be a lucky Mistress and can't wait until our next cam session as I know he wont disappoint.*

* Before anyone starts to complain, yes he did receive aftercare after this session. Obviously a broken sub is a useless sub so I made sure he warmed himself back up slowly and properly and was happy with how things went.

Monday, 21 January 2013

My New Gifts

This last week has seen a lovely little flurry of gifts arriving at my door, the Amazon delivery guy are on first name terms now and i'm thinking of extending an offer for a cut price thrashing. I joke of course, my thrashings are well worth the money you boys pay for them!

So I guess this post is just one of frivolity for me and probably wanking fodder for some of you as I am going to post pics of the things I have received. I hope you enjoy looking at them as much I have thoroughly enjoyed receiving them and wearing them.

My sparkly new bracelet 

My beautiful new baby pink corset

Back shot of my new PVC dress

Front of my new PVC dress

My new PVC skirt

Another new PVC dress plus the added messy bedroom lol

My new PVC top

So all that is left to say is thank you to the boys who have contributed to my expanding wardrobe and also please do continue to make me smile by behaving and you can also purchase further items from my wishlist as I do keep topping it up so there's always something for you to buy :)

Miss Beth x

Sunday, 13 January 2013

Little Jolly

I seem to be blessed with quite a few good boys lately and a couple of them have come along as a result of twitter of all things. Little Jolly, is one of those boys. He is a fantastic slave and is very experienced in femdom and pretty much all of it's facets so I think myself fortunate to be able to call him mine, for now.

Our play sessions have only been online so far but hopeful that one day we shall meet. Even though we haven't met face to face we have had a couple of fun times via facetime on our iPhones. The first task that we used this service for was just before Christmas on a particularly chilly night, I decided to send him outside after work in the freezing cold, naked of course and once there he had to complete a series of tasks which was purely for my amusement. I couldn't stop laughing as he shivered and grimaced in the very cold night air whilst he was doing a lap of his garden for all his neighbours to see. After all of his exertions I decided to reward him with a nice sit down on the cold hard floor outside whilst we had a nice little chat. You see I am very thoughtful.

The next facetime session I had him entertain me by having a ruined orgasm. Well it was time to clean the pipes out as he had been denied for 2 months. Now that was most entertaining, especially as his frantic moaning changed from those which accompanied his furious strokes to ones which signified disappointment, frustration and complete submission. Ahh it really does warm your cockles!

In between our facetime sessions he has complied with many amusing tasks such as sleeping on the floor, sleeping with a butt plug in all night, going to work with slogans written on his body, pictures using Christmas decorations to enter a competition on twitter, avoiding cumming during intercourse and placing his balls into iced water for set length of time. However my favourite thing, purchasing a pair of hessian trousers from Deviant Designs and being made to wear them all day under his work pants. They really are the gift that keeps on giving!

In return for all of my fabulous guidance and care he has kept me in excellent supply with lingerie (which you will see in various pics online), fantastic shoes and most recently a PVC dress which I have yet to be photographed in.

 A wee bit chilly is it? Oh good :)

 The pants from Deviant Designs

Suitable attire for Sunday lunch with the folks don't you think?

Not quite sure about the socks but the Christmas lights are effective.

LJ the things I love most about you is I never have to ask you for anything (tasks aside) you just know your place and you give to me freely, then there's your infectious smile when we play, lets me know we are both getting something from our exploits. Thank you LJ for everything so far, you really make this so much fun.

Puppetboys Clean Start

As you all know (if you've been keeping up to date) I have a fabulous sub called puppetboy whom belongs to my blackmail circle. He's always eager and keen to please me no matter what task I set him so I though I would really test his metal. So now you're all thinking I had him edge until his cock bled or I told him he had to bash his balls until they resembled a deformed beanbag, well you're all wrong! What is the one thing most men are absolutely terrible at?


If you recall in my previous post I wrote that I was looking for a part time job to keep me out of trouble, well I found one in just 3 days (lesson to all of you out there, there is work if you really want it) and now I am part of a team who provides bespoke cleaning services for high end houses. Naturally this gave me an idea :)

Puppetboy was to take a room in his house and not an easy room like the hall etc but one which really needed attention, he then had to photograph it before and after a very good cleaning session, plus he had to provide a specific photo during the task. I have to admit, knowing what boys are like for living in pig sty's and there ineptitude for proper cleaning I chuckled to myself as I thought this task he was surely doomed to fail.

It turns out I have an excellent sub who has yet again not only impressed me but made me so proud.

 See I was right about boys!
 And just in case you didn't get the entire picture lol

My pretty little maid doing as he's told, dressed in the appropriate attire.


Didn't he do well? From sty to palace, I'm sure his lady appreciates my efforts.

Puppetboy, you really are a very good boy and you have pleased me immensely once again, your reward is knowing just how much you have impressed me and made me smile. You worked hard there and I am very lucky to have a sub like you at my disposal, you are appreciated.

Here's to the next task :)

Tuesday, 8 January 2013

New Year New Beginnings

Last year saw me start to offer sessions in a real time setting and I set up a new website to help get my name out there on all of the Mistress sites etc. It did work for a while and business picked up, which is always fun for me, fresh meat an' all that lol. However there does seem to be an increase in the amount of timewasters and wankers out there which yes did unfortunately jade me a little, but the excellent boys I do have in my stable reminded me how lucky I am and that they're not all the same.

Then everything seemed to happen at once, a sudden and shocking bereavement followed by mass norovirus outbreak at the Miss Beth household and before we knew it Christmas was upon us. This one was more stressful than any other as I was the one doing Christmas for the family, food prep and house to get ready for visitors and people staying over. There was hardly a minute to myself. Plus the transition from kinky to vanilla was not a welcome one for me at all and I couldn't wait for it to be all over so that normality could return for me.


So to this year and it will see a few changes happening in my life, ones which I don't anticipate to make a whole lot of difference to how things have been going with this side of things. I am still offering services both online and in real time but I will be a bit more blunt in communication with new people so as to rid myself of the chaff before they become an annoyance to me and cause unnecessary head aches. Of course this is a business for me and I need money as much as the next person but relying solely on a strangers money in whatever form it arrives has become something which has given me a lot to think about.

I don't want to session with people because I need their cash, I want to session with people because there's a connection and they understand what the hell they're getting into. I want to session with someone because we have a mutual need (not a sexual one before you ask), one where they aim to please consistantly and I get treated the way I should be treated. I am sick to death of people thinking they will session with me and get everything they want and nothing for me. I will not be putting myself forth for anything that makes me feel even the slightest bit uncomfortable which sadly I had done without knowing until I looked back on it all. I also wont be selling myself short anymore, I may not have a massive history of experience in this field but what I do know about and have experience with I do bloody well and those fortunate to serve me are just that, fortunate!

With regards to being able to be a little more exacting with whom I agree to take on I will be also looking for a vanilla job so that taking your money from you via blackmail etc will be even more sweeter for me. As I will only be looking for a part time job I will still have plenty of time for all my current boys and vacancies will be advertised accordingly. I want to ensure that I have enough boys to make me happy but also so that you get what you require and pay for. All subs, new and old will still get 100% from me as long as you return the service properly.

The new year has already started well with the dismissal of Pathetic Pauline. It was a sad moment really as he had been under my control for about 12 months but he had his chances and took the piss to be honest so wanting to start my new year properly he was ejected. He wasn't nasty, he knows what he did wrong and he knows how to correct it and make the effort and if he so wishes he may be considered again BUT not before he proves himself to me.

I need to draw attention to the fact that even before I was starting to look for a vanilla job, I actually did have a life of my own to contend with. I don't just sit here waiting for people to email me but those worth making the time for, I did just that. So those of you who get annoyed by the fact I don't reply within minutes of receiving your emails, don't bother emailing again. I am not at your beck and call, that's not how this works. I am also not so stupid to think you're at my beck and call, it's a mutual arrangement which needs to be discussed and met. 

I would also like to add right here that I am not a prostitute or an escort so please stop asking me if I will have sex with you, I do know a good escort should you require the number of one. Also could you refrain from telling me what you want to do to me sexually and for the love of goddess stop sending me cock pics unless of course it's accompanied by a £10 amazon voucher for entry and abuse on my SPH wall. Those kinds of pics are very welcome lol. Just as a side note, I don't do anything at all for free, my time comes with a price.

So to recap here are a few points:
  • Timewasters will be told in no uncertain terms to get lost immediately.
  • Subs who forget their place twice will be dismissed.
  • I am not an escort, I will not interact sexually with you.
  • I am not desperate for your cash but I will take it from you non the less. A girl needs nice things.
  • I am looking for connections and understanding to be able to session with you online/real time.
  • I am not sat here waiting for your email or attention.

So with all that in mind I think this year is going to be a bloody good one for all concerned. I hope you all had a great new year and I look forward to speaking with you (well some of you) as this year progresses. I shall also be making an effort to attend events in Liverpool, Birmingham and London and also to meet other Mistresses and Masters I have been speaking with online.

After you have read this I hope it explains things clearly and you understand what you have read. Now subbies/slaves go and buy me something nice from my wishlist to show your appreciation. There's things on there from a couple of pound upwards, so something for everyone's pocket so there's no excuse.

Miss Beth xx